My life has not been perfect and is not perfect – there is no such thing – but I am thankful for the Love of those who, before me, gave their life to keeping Alive the Real, the Soul, the Spiritual Reality.
Over these past months and days what is arising more and more in me is this feeling that I do not want to be “how” I have been ..how I have imparted myself to all these Dear Souls here over the past years. I feel like never before, this aching intensity in the Heart of how we are all Sacred Beings, and how we are all so Lightly here, how we are all like fragile stems of flowers holding ourselves up in all kinds of weather reaching for the Sun, and how our Silent Souls Hold our unspeakable Love and Beauty and Peace – a Soul-Full Being we all struggle to listen to, to reunite with and give expression to.
If the Spiritual Reality is the Reality for you, then it will more and more move you to heartfully acknowledge and see every human-being IS a Soul…an unblemished Soul, (no matter their outer world crafted character) but, a Life Born Soul rather than merely the self-protective coping character we construct around the Soul… or over the Soul. Yes, the self-protective world reactive persona is there and yes we can be and do all kinds of unkind things to each other, but all these tendencies are the result of our being uprooted from the Soul…and thus migrating to the worldly or outer interface persona we claim to be I….our self.
We are trying to cope in a conditional realm with a conditionally constructed self….a self, therefore that will always feel threatened.
In terms of Spiritual Based Liberation (that is… the Purpose of Spiritual Practice) it must be understood that Spiritual-Practice-Understanding is for the purpose of the Awakening out of our outer world character-self, to the Reality of the Soul – the unblemished, the unconditional Spiritual Reality of our Form, our Life. The Source of our Being.
By birth, our vital-shock, or feeling confinement to entrapment in a seemingly singular body provokes, in the absence of Soul Education, Soul nurturing, Soul Wisdom Community, the development of a hardened outer shell, a self-alone- fighting for itself persona…..one we believe and call I…myself.
However, this reactively constructed self-protective custodian character-self will inevitably resist, fight back, want control, do everything to stay in place….it so often wants to close the Life-Force down….with-hold or prevent the Real Transformations It will instigate…transformations that may not be in line with what the one we call “our-self” wants.
After all, this outer worldly self… its function… is to be successful in the outer world and at the same time hide and protect the emptiness we feel as a result of not being empowered by the Soul. It most often senses threat, but what is threatened? We can even feel threatened to truly look. This hardened carapace, the protective self around the Heart-Soul is afraid of seeing clearly and of being seen clearly.
Its censorious nature keeps itself in place by making judgements of others, berating itself that it should be better, smarter, onto it, more spiritual, more something. It keeps itself to itself by finding the lie in others rather than the lie in itself.
It speaks not for the Soul but for its own survival. And, with all the inherited pseudo good social religious cultural morals upon which we so goodly and righteously and so often “spiritually” craft this persona, this self-saving “self”……. we have, in fact, albeit unconsciously, hardened our-selves over our Soul, hardened our feeling Heart to Life It Self. It rapes us, it defiles us, it cuts us off from our own Inherent Beauty and Majesty and Mystery – our Very Grace-Full Self.
I am not a snob, I am not superior or inferior, I am not an abstract academic nor am I wanting or looking for perhaps exciting but distracting conversations. I just find conversations tedious when they are merely an exchange of inherited traditions, values and beliefs and approval seeking. They very rarely call each other into the unknown. Why? I suggest because it is just too dangerous for our self-protective custodian character that makes sure no one can see through it.
Truly examine what we call conversations. These usual conversations are not invitations to the Soul. Quite the opposite. In fact, we are most often left anguished, oppressed, toubled, by what is not talked about. Now, it is important to me that you understand I am not referring to the so called “elephant in the room”, the ill feelings between anyone, the problem that one wants addressed and how someone or everyone does not understand them and so forth, and how we should be confronting this and really sorting things out.
If we see, understand how we relate to our self and others via the outer self-protective character…. as the self….. rather than the Soul being the Self, the Very Spirit Reality…. then we begin to hear how our conversations are “talking on the outside, not talking on the inside”. Our conversations are not, most generally invitations into the Domain of the Soul.
Rather, what is not talked about is a conversation that is an invitation to the Soul. What is not talked about is our own exile from the Soul. What is not talked about is how to begin re-union with the Soul, how to care for the Soul, how to nourish the Soul, how to empower the Soul, how to Live as the Soul. Well, to genuinely do this, you must be sincerely Love-fully committed to the Life of the Soul not just merely physical survival.
The endless round, the constant regurgitation, of fossilized conversations that are postulated as a deep dive into self-understanding and are projected as worthy of your Life-Energies socially moral polite listening and consideration. You know…obligingly expressing with all the effort of limiting your full vocabulary to “Oh interesting” and neatly delivered with a well-crafted smile to camouflage the discomfort of feeling Your Souls longing for Its Self. But, hey, we tell ourselves, we tell each other, we must play the socially moral game. The game of the hole in the Hearts custodian.
You cannot expect your relationships to evolve, your Very Life Process to evolve, be Transformed, to move into more expansive yet paradoxically perhaps, greater Inherent intimacy if you are not inviting each other into conversations of the Soul, invitations to the Soul, fragilities and strengths of the Soul, Vulnerabilities of the Soul.
There are different ways of cognizing this existence, yourself, forms of relationship, rather than the ways, the examples, passed on to you that we commonly either repeat or only rebel against leaving still no breathing space for the Soul to mediate Its Transcendental Wisdom- that which is beyond both sides of the usual threatened outer character …the mind-field of right or wrong, good or bad, good person bad person and so forth. All the still, only, self-saving new ways of thinking wrapped in a modern fashionable libertarian philosophy.
My life has not been perfect and is not perfect – there is no such thing – but I am thankful for the Love of those who, before me, gave their life to keeping Alive the Real, the Soul, the Spiritual Reality. I am thankful for the ever-increasing influence of Love alone and having this brief moment to Be the Being in Human Form as You are also. But, this must be Realised. This must be Celebrated. This is the Souls Invitation to All.
Beloved, don’t be afraid to start over again; this time you are not starting from scratch – you are starting from a greater Understanding of your self and how you now wish to conduct your human life.
If there is no struggle, no disappointments, no regrets, no grief, there is no progress, no evolvement, no real embodiment in Life, rather, you are trying to live in an abstract ideal way. Where have you been all this time?
And, as I continually journey across the divide between the worldly or outer conditional-body-self to the Prior and always present unconditioned, un blemished, Life-Beating Soul Being of the body/mind I see now, that what I once perceived as bravery, is not always the case. I can see again and again how the Souls self-forgetting Loves Humility is Bravery.
The Great Journey through and beyond our own conditionally fortified (by all means possible – social, cultural, religious and egotised -spiritualism ) self, is strewn with humiliation after humiliation. Oh Beloved Heart, make the Journey. I am with You.
Death is not the greatest loss of life; the greatest loss of life is what dies inside us while we live; the Soul.