As a seeker, we do not relate to each other in any Real-Life Consciousness Sense but through the sense of our own wanting to fulfill our own lack of Self Worth, which is brought about by this worldly incursion and colonization of our Birthed Life Consciousness – the Truth Condition of the Body Mind Being.
The words ‘Truth Condition’ describe the Condition of Consciousness before you or I were instructed, enforced, before we were taught to conform It to a particular worldly identity or concept.
The Truth-Condition of Consciousness or Spirit can also be described as the Innocent Consciousness that contains all Life within it.
Does a newborn human know whether it is a Mormon, a Christian, an Indian, a European, a smart person, a dull person, a Kayapo Indian, a Catholic, a success or failure, someone’s satisfaction or disappointment, is living a worthy life or an unworthy life, a popular life or an unpopular life? Does that newborn, meaning ‘unconditioned Consciousness’, feel that she or he is right or wrong? And on and on… No, they have no argument from which to argue – only the Love for Life.
The Truth-Condition of Consciousness is not informed by, nor bound to, any outer-world identity, to any conditionally-informed identity, it therefore has no outer-worldly-created identity motive – there is only the Eternal, Impersonal, Forces-of-Nature Motive.
The word ‘Satsang’ means ‘the Company of Truth’, to be in the Company of Truth. For you or I to be in the Company of Truth, we must be in the Company of our Inherent, or Prior condition of Consciousness, the True Being-ness of You.
Whatever the Form is, animal, human or plant, this is the true Life-Intelligence of that Form. No matter how that Form is appearing in the world, it has its Root Lineage in the Truth Condition of Consciousness, from which its particular Form will be well Served. In contrast, this worldly-conditioned Consciousness, which befell us without our Consent, does not Serve our Form well at all. And we know it. Yet, we persist to find a way within it – the seeker.
Satsang is Whole-bodily intuitive Love-feeling with and in one’s Truth Condition of Consciousness, rather than habitually, whole-bodily thinking and feeling into the worldly-conditioned state of Consciousness – who i think i am.
Without knowing what we were doing, in order to cope with and be what others want us to be, we constructed a conceptualized self that we put between our Radiant Life-Gifted Consciousness and the world. We had no idea of what was taking place, we were too young to be aware of what we were adapting to. We were taught how to be, what to think, how to be fearful, what and who we belong to – and therefore, what and who we need to please in order to somehow survive in this conditionally uncertain world. While we each crafted and shaped according to what we thought we would find safety in, this conceptualized self also locks us away from Life, from our Very Free Radiant Soul-Life Self.
Ah, we have now joined the ranks of the seeker, we are now enfolded in the search.
Satsang is whole-bodily Feeling Receptivity, and therefore Response to and with the Truth Condition, the Uncontaminated Spirit Condition that in the first place brought all Forms into Existence. To say that we are self-obsessed is to say that we are habitually receptive to, and in reaction to, our conditioned Consciousness.
Trying to function in a lesser state of consciousness, the personal-self mind is endlessly disturbed, always trying to fulfil itself, complete itself, find its lost satisfaction… and it never does because it is also this mind that is depreciating you.
It (or you) has misplaced, left behind, got coerced out of, its Truth Condition of Life-Consciousness and is now a seeking mind, looking for that which it feels is missing – but it mistakes what is missing for something in the world: another experience, some new knowledge, another spiritual belief, another person, a better image, the right outer approval, a better conceptual self. It is a mind that, while never feeling quite good enough, is always provoked to defend its own seeking, it is a mind that is never really present, always wandering… always wondering where the gold is, where the best chance is at being fulfilled… A seeking mind is a mind addicted to working out – yes, always outsourcing, always working out.
Satsang-Communion and Its Communication, the Inherent and always-Present Spirit Condition, is an obstacle to the mind that is still trying to fulfill the lesser worldly-condition Consciousness – the one we now think we are, the one we call “I”, the conditioned state of Consciousness that we never had any choice in.
Satsang, I am sure you will perhaps perceive, feel and realize, contains and communicates It-Self (the Truth Condition of Your Consciousness, the Company of Truth) as a Demand, and this Demand is an obstacle to the conditioned conceptual mind.
Satsang (Spirit-based Life, Wisdom-based Existence) is the Demand of the Radical Heart/Soul Life of the Body Mind Being, and it communicates Its Own Demand upon the conditioned mind. However, within the habitual thinking and perceiving of the conditioned mind, we then perceive this demand within the context of the conditioned mind’s search – the search to fulfill the conditioned self, the limited conceptual self. Well, of course we would, for as long as we do not genuinely see, without blame or self-defense, what we have done, what we are actually all the time actively doing to our-self that makes us feel that we are not worthy of Existence, then we will always be looking… searching for some illusive idea of how we should be.
We talk of stopping, of being with our-self, of taking the time to look and feel things and so forth… On one level of the conditional mind that’s fine, especially in a society that bombards us with so many “this will make you happy” good-time choices, so many demands on one’s attention of ways to fulfill your self, to be successful, to be popular, and to get the attention that we crave etc. But, even those who declare that they want to be more still, cease racing after good-times and attention and messages of approval and so on, continue to employ the conditioned mind to strategize towards this elusive end.
You see, the seeking, the search, also communicates its demand of us. The entire society, our modern education, our relationships, our religions and our so-called conventional spiritual practices, are all based in the communication and expectation and demand of the search. In fact, our morals are based in and righteously promote the search. You must adhere to the search otherwise you will be rejected, you will be an apostate, you will not be liked, you will be criticized and made to feel like a failure. They each play on and manipulate the conditioned-Consciousness dilemma.
As a seeker, we do not relate to each other in any Real-Life Consciousness Sense but through the sense of our own wanting to fulfill our own lack of Self Worth, which is brought about by this worldly incursion and colonization of our Birthed Life Consciousness – the Truth Condition of the Body Mind Being. No wonder we can feel split from our Self, ill at ease with our self, and all the feelings of guilt and shame; no wonder we can feel unworthy of Existence, when the mind has been colonized by one or other conceptual shape – a worldly implanting of an identity that we did not come with.
We are slaves to the demand of the search within us and we relate to each other in and via the search. We fundamentally use each other, albeit, thinly camouflaged by words such as ‘love’ and ‘friendship’ and ‘sharing’ and ‘spiritual brothers and sisters’, but in fact insisting that we help each other in the search. Our own seeking to be loved, to be acknowledged, to be approved of, is the underlying motive to many of our interactions with each other. Cautiously, stressfully, self-consciously seeking to extract our sense of worth out of every conversation, every experience, every relationship, every prayer and offering; always looking out for the next gold mine, the next win, the next relief, the next scrap of confirmation that we exist from someone. We are endlessly pulling each other into our own particular seeking and calling it love or spiritual practice.
Satsang is the Principle Relationship of the body-mind Being with the Truth State of Consciousness. This, relationship must become the Primary Love-Full Relationship if we are to grow beyond the conditioned Consciousness, if we are to grow beyond the seeker, if we are to realize True Life Empowerment, if we are to Live in the Full Dignity of our Life-Gifted Consciousness – our First and Final coming and going – the True and Only Forever Lineage of all Forms and Worlds.
Whatever you make of me, I do not Live the search to you. I am not the search and I do not converse the search with you. My relatedness with you, what-ever You feel it to be or want it to be, is not in the search. This is the very thing that will from time to time, or maybe all the time, frustrate you, even anger you, annoy you, make you feel that I am against you, not with you, distant from you, not loving you.
My Guru, my husband, my wife, my son, my daughter, my lover – are all terms within the search. No one is your Guru, your lover… no one is your parent, your possession – they are all servants of the Eternal Impersonal Forces of Nature, just as your own body is.
The underlying ‘stuck’ energy here, the so-called elephant-in-the-room, the repressed dispositional energy that is so thinly veiled in our conversations – is the resulting outcome of our own self-protected search – our working out if we will get the results that we want. The ‘elephant in the room’ is the atmosphere, the almost suffocating lack of Life-Energy that is being tightly withheld by the seeker, frozen in the breath-stopping self-conscious wanting of their demands, of their story, of their self-appointed entitlements to be met, to be understood, to be indulged, to be satisfied. The seeker is the thief in Your mind, the swindler in Your Life, in Your relationships, in the room. The so-called ‘elephant’ in the room is the human who is inhabiting their own seeking demands.
It is not so much that I am saying goodbye.
I am saying, in so many ways, that your relatedness to me is within your search, you are trying to understand Life, Love, your-self, from the point of view of your search. You are trying to use Me within your search, within your seeking, and you will do so until you wake from the mind’s conditioned Consciousness.
I am not the search and here, in My Company, you are not being used in the search. If you truly come into My Company then you are free of the search because the search, seeking, is absent in My Company. If I feel sad, it is how you are using each other within the search, relating to each other from the felt demands of the search. You will use others in the name of love but for the purpose of the search and then discard the other for some better satisfaction within the search. We pull everything into our search and you will use me in your search.
You might like to say that you are loyal, that you are a Lover, that you have someone’s best interest at Heart, that your conversations are for the purpose of discovering the Truth, however, what Truth? – when we are not whole-body love feeling-relatedness in the Truth Condition. What then are we actually loyal too? What are you loyal to? I suggest that we are consciously or unconsciously loyal to our search, to our private seeking. What are our conversations based in? What do they serve? Who do they serve? What is their root motivation? Are we merely wanting to find out where we are at with someone, if we have a chance with them to satisfy the urges of our search? I suggest that most generally, our conversations are self-deceptively but strategically crafted around our own self-glamorizing search.
This Heart Ashram-Hermitage Sanctuary is not based in the dilemma, the search for self-fulfillment of the conditional self. The Living Heart Ashram’s Siddhi, Spirit, is not some new ideology, is not a better way of spiritual seeking, is not for the spiritually righteous self-satisfying, self-consoling, private self-redemptive Circumstance of the seeker.
My relatedness to you is not in the context of the seeker. Many will become disenchanted with me, resentful towards me, angry with me, disillusioned with me and cynical of me whenever they feel or hear that I am not fitting into the context of their search – and their spiritual search is their most righteous one.
A Monastery, a Sanctuary, is a place, a circumstance, a space, wherein the search is absent, not active in any way.
It represents the Very Heart or Life Consciousness of All and all.
Once this is understood in the very Heart of the Human, then she or he realizes that there is no need for the search because the Truth Condition is Self-Evident. It was always Present as the Very Self Life-Consciousness Being. There is nowhere else to look for it, to Realize It.
That One is already Living You, Breathing You and Carrying You.
Oh, Beloved.